Conductor Charles Hazlewood said that he had to go through a “long recovery process” as a result of the sexual abuse he suffered as a child.
Musicians told the BBC’s Desert Island Disc that he felt “ready to share a hidden part” of his life in public for the first time after “more than a decade of healing and therapy”.
Hazlewood told host Lauren Laverne that he had decided to talk about it because “abuse is something that develops with secrecy, it is the toxic energy that is the source of his strength”.
He said: “I was a victim of sexual abuse through much of my childhood.”
The conductor added: “All the pedophiles I know as a child, they sell them to me as a form of love and that is the most confusing and destructive thing to make a child invest and trust.
“This fundamentally messes up your entire cable so I will only tell anyone who is afraid that they might have some in it, never fool yourself that this is love.
“Never kid yourself that the child can be an equal partner in this matter.
“All you do is give them a blemish and some damage within them that will probably last a lifetime.”
Hazlewood said he did not discuss the abuse he suffered with anyone despite the fact that he showed a lot of behavior that would be questioned by parents in the present.
He said he felt “suicidal enough enough” after being sent to boarding school because of his behavior.
The conductor said he had to go through a “long recovery process”, adding: “I am very, very fortunate to have a beautiful wife and beautiful children around me, holding my hands and hugging me and only holding me tight and safe because I have passed my path. “
Desert Island Discs Sunday is on BBC Radio 4 on Sunday at 11 am and on BBC Sounds.
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