You should know by now not to come bursting through this foxhole babbling about useless college football bowl games.
No such thing.
Bowl games, including some good ones, but especially ones from Cheez-It or some sort of Mayo Duke and anything involving Famous Idaho Potatoes, get us through the holidays.
Admittedly, this latest season is, we must say, a test of patience.
Looking back, there was never a rhythm to it. Everything seems rushed or forced or, most of the time, TBA.
It’s great when the NCAA raises its exemption requirement for a winning streak – bad football can also be fun to watch, especially when a water cooler full of french fries is involved.
More and more Merrier Christmas, I always say.
But it is too often this season that the “bountiful caution” pops up his ugly head and the bowl celebration is canceled.
There is an entire day without college football.
I know that a lot. But did you realize that 17 bowl games were canceled? Only 24 were played.
That’s not enough.
It is a crisis. But the bowl that was canceled was all because of COVID-19 precautions.
And, hopefully, that’s a one-year setback.
But some of those that are actually played fill all kinds of bills, few of which exist.
It seems that the best you can hope for is comic relief, which isn’t really COVID-related.
Anyone who invented the term “opt-out” was not a fan of college football and certainly never tried to beat his peers by filling the office bowl pool with no clue as to which player might turn up.
I doubt any of those who missed their post-season games did so out of concern that social distancing might not apply to the mail at the Cotton Bowl.
We are now living in a new normal in which players decide it is time to “concentrate on my preparation for the NFL draft” with “quitting football.”
Crazy logic, I know.
But I never figured out how diluting the College Football Playoff field by increasing it to eight teams should make us better, a more competitive quarter-final than the most recent (tilted) four-team semi-final.
However, at least there are no options for the team in the playoffs.
The rest of the bowl suffers greatly for those missing as they did due to the pandemic’s setback.
All preliminaries have their reasons, mostly to protect themselves, and in the current climate it is illegal to criticize unpaid college players, especially those who are in a position to be paid well in the future.
The NFL has made it clear that team loyalty is not a factor when drafting.
This has really become a trendy thing to do, even for some whose NFL aspirations are pipe dreams.
It’s not good for our beloved bowl season and there are no easy answers. Vaccinated countries will not solve this problem.
In the meantime, here are some suggestions for next year’s new bowl series:
That Opt-Out.com Bowl: The Rudys of the world is finally getting meaningful minutes and fans are treated to a sneak preview of next year’s team (minus this year’s stars). Take a look at the newbies who may choose not to participate next year.
The Business Decision Bowl: The opt-out has to go out to flip a coin… accompanied by their new agent.
The Interim Bowl: Players aren’t the only ones to opt out. Most trainers get a bonus for making bowl games. More and more seem to have been fired because of it. But someone, usually an assistant, has to coach the team on the way out the door.
Set an Example Bowl: Some trainers go alone, for greener pastures. Some managed to say goodbye before fleeing
The Audition Bowl: You can always play the joke that the temporary head coach has the chance to make hay with the quest committee.
I Love My Teammates Bowl: But it’s not enough to join them on the pitch other than to be there “in the spirit.”
Battle for the Trophy Bowl Participation: Two teams with a losing record who promise not to be shy about the coin tossing.
Playing for the Pride Bowl: Two teams that are bad before they even out, but still have a good game.
The Swag Bowl: Only people who get a lot of prizes of Xbox or Bluetooth earbuds in a goodie bowl bag for trying them out for Dear Old U. – and the GoPro cameras are the closest they’ll get to the NFL.
Scooter Hobbs covers LSU
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